by: Minda Harts, Founder, The Memo
Each minute of the day seems to bring another (heart)breaking news story, and I start to wonder: does self-care come at a cost? In the media, we constantly read about attacks on black women like Sandra Bland and Chikesia Clemons. Women, and especially women of color, have had to start multiple hashtag movements to rally and get some respect around here for ourselves and for each other.
Part of self-care is doing temperature checks on ourselves, as well as checking in with and supporting the other women in our lives. Just because we see our friends posting “lit” pictures of themselves, doesn’t always equate to what’s going on behind the scenes in their minds and their real lives.
Sometimes we have to exit the group text, pick up the phone, and check in with our friends. Personally, I always appreciate a good check in by phone, even though I might contemplate for five seconds if I want to answer or not (keeping it real); however, I always leave the call feeling refreshed and glad I took time out of my “busy” schedule to catch up.
We spend an average of 90,000 hours of our lives at work. Outside of sleeping, the majority of your time will be spent working. How are you standing up for your fellow sister in the workplace? Too many times we leave other women to break the glass ceiling alone, while we conveniently “do our own thing.”
At the end of the day, we are our sister’s keeper. And not just the sisters we know--this includes ones we have yet to meet! How are you supporting and showing love to the women in your life and to ones you pass by on the street? The great Audre Lorde wrote, “We have to consciously study how to be tender with each other until it becomes a habit, because what was native has been stolen from us, the love of Black women for each other.” This quote doesn’t just apply to black women, but should serve as a mandate for all women.
If you don’t believe me, listen to our forever First Lady, Michelle Obama: “So many of us have gotten ourselves to the table, but we’re still too grateful to be at the table to really shake it up.”
We are our sister's keeper. Let’s check in more with each other and stand together on the issues that hold all women back. Either we are at the table or on the menu!