by: Minda Harts, Founder, The Memo
Last week, I asked you to consider committing to yourself as the vibe for 2019. How is that coming along?
One of the things that I said I would commit to is incorporating some balance in my life. By nature, I am a workhorse; I don’t know how not to work. Which in turn makes all my conversations work-ish. Even when I am trying to have fun, it somehow comes back to work. My idea of fun these days is attending a good networking event. Just the other day, I was hanging out with one of my favorite people. They said “Minda please stop talking about work while we are at the museum.” I was embarrassed to be called out, but I must admit, I didn’t even realize I was doing it.
I realized that securing my seat at the table wasn't about my insatiable need to work harder--it had to do with my current idea of what success looked like.
Then I started to think about what it is that drives me to work so hard. Obviously, we all have reasons--for instance, we might want increased wealth, a new home, a vacation, or to help our families. I began to re-imagine what success could look like by my own standards rather than on what I have seen or been conditioned to think. Am I not successful because I didn’t get to Tulum or Miami Beach last year? Am I not successful because I am not married and have chosen not to have kids? Yet, I am happy and fulfilled with what I do have.
I was allowing other’s world view to dominate my version of success--which ultimately affects the balance (or lack thereof) in my life. If I look back on MY LIFE, I have done more than I ever thought I would do and checked new boxes that I wasn’t even sure I had the agency to check. I am now re-imagining what success looks like for me and it doesn't require anyone's approval or permission (but I always appreciate the support).
Can I make one more ask of you for this year? I want you to re-imagine success by your own terms. What would success look like if you took the glass ceiling off yourself and stopped pursuing someone else's version of success? Would you go for that promotion or would you decide you’re happy with the position you have? Would you move back home with your parents or have a roommate so that you could save up to buy your dream home? Take the glass ceiling off and go after a form of personal success. Any way you slice it, happiness and fulfillment is the only way we secure a successful seat in a sustainable way.
Cheers to 2019 being successful by however you define it!